There would be room in the Nightmare on Elm Street-verse for a 900 number that would end up trying to kill you. That’s a very Nightmare on Elm Street way to die, and very ’80s. We got the tongue phone in the original and again in New Nightmare, but that’s more of a Freddy prank and not a true mortal threat.
Here in the real world we got a 900 number for Freddy but instead of killing you, it just disappoints you.
Freddy’s got some “deadtime stories…straight from the boiler room to your home!” What terrifying tales awaited callers? Must be something truly chilling to justify that two-dollar-first-minute, right?
Well, when you called in you were treated to a quick Freddy intro followed by a lengthy scary story narrated by someone who wasn’t Freddy. A lengthy story, but not a meaty one; these were pretty simple “and then they ran into a homicidal maniac” stories. Freddy then returns after the story concludes and vamps for as long as you have forty-cents-es.
I have to give them some credit: these are impressively recorded stories. There are multiple voice actors, sound effects, the works. It’s like a radio play, probably was a radio play purchased and played out in lo-fi on a telephone line. Here’s 45 minutes of the calls – judge for yourself. Be warned: those Freddy puns are FRIGHTFULLY lacking.